A new chapter begins

So, I’m now enrolled at Deakin[1]. (Another uni here in Melbourne, way out in the sticks in terms of public transport from here, about an hour and a half each way. We have so many good unis here, it’s embarrassing.)

The last few weeks have been traumatic, to say the least. My last article on this was titled “How fragile we are” and while it’s not been as bad as that, it’s been close.

The phonecall with Monash was both very unsatisfactory, and eventually great. Bottom line at Monash was: “Well, you’re finished here.” Which is kinda crushing.

But the coda was: “Have you considered Deakin?” And I hadn’t considered Deakin, because I was expecting to get it finished at Monash. But A knew someone there, highly recommended the course, and gave me contact details.

Which I managed to use, without, it must be said, much hope. Teaching was about  to start, things at uni are crazy busy, people take days to answer. Hard to get motivated for trying to start again while feeling like it’s all just too hard and pointless.

Which is NOT what happened here. Not close. Greatly surprised to get an email back within a few minutes. We flicked emails back and forth. A meeting was setup for a few days hence.

And a good meeting it was too, really interesting. We agreed that it would be best to do it part-time, meaning I had until June 2018 rather than later this year to finish it by.

Then I get a call from the head of school, and he’s also a Curtin guy, who was running honours there when I was enrolled but had to quit to come to Melbourne . We reminisced about discussing footy and Ben Cousins 🙂

So  I’ve enrolled at Deakin. And it feels good so far. Much smaller than Monash, which is nice. Most glad I got pointed here.

Just a shame about the 90 minutes walking and public transport each way. Ah well, it’s not that bad.

And that’s one of the joys of depression – up, down and around. Mine is a general flatness, where every day is pretty meh, who cares, but it’s SO EASY to spiral downwards from there. So hard to actually get motivated to do stuff. Really frustrating. Being told you’ve been kicked out of a uni because they failed you when you thought they were deferring you because of medical is a real kick in the head.

As I said above, it was really difficult to contact Deakin – another rejection was almost too hard to contemplate. Yeah, it turned out to be awesome, but that’s not what you expect when you’re crawling around on the ground after a good kicking.

Still, we trudge on.

[1] Yeah, this is going to cover both mental health and academics, because they’re intertwined, and one doesn’t make much sense without the other. Stupid depression, affecting everything 🙂

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